Handling my emotions and keeping calm, especially under stress or immense pressure has not been my strong suit, and while it is very easy to say "just do it", it is with proper guidance on the hows, the constant support, kind encouragement and to put it all into practice at each and every trying moment that one grows.
That has been my experience working with Mel and LT, and in particular, 2 distinctive life events have emerged to shape the course of my life, my growth and coming to terms with my real Self.
The first event was handling the demise of a short lived relationship with an emotionally volatile ex who turned into a stalker. When I plucked up the courage to listen to my gut all these while - to end things with the individual because I knew he wasn't good for me, LT guided me on understanding why I had attracted him - that in my life I had given my power away to men in relationships because I felt I wasn't good/capable enough, nor was I willing to take on responsibility (which was a far cry of what I know to be true). That his emotional volatility was a mirror of who I could become given the path I was on, being somewhat emotionally volatile myself.
To recognize my own areas that I absolutely needed to work on to walk my own path and be the powerful, knowing Being that I know I am meant to be. In many respects I have always admired and respected Hillary Clinton because I feel and could identify with her and also, want to be like her - calm, strong, authoritative, eloquent and successful - but in my own way. Facing up to and having the courage to break off the relationship given the constant guidance from LT - especially when the going got rough once he started stalking me - was a continuous exercise to keep calm under stress and not to subjugate my truth and knowing to someone else, nor to give my power away.
It was difficult to stay the course rather than to capitulate to his demands, but it was always the kind, loving and firm encouragement from Mel+LT that helped me stay strong.
It taught me that it was absolutely necessary to possess emotional mastery and to never give my power away - that I have all I need within me.
As I continued my spiritual journey, things that I had longed for but always believed I wasn't good enough for - in this case, a career in management consulting started gnawing at me. Again, this was a lesson - in loving myself for who I am, in knowing that I am truly capable, and that I deserve a career that brings about abundance and joy in my life.
Through numerous consultations with Mel+LT, they impressed upon me that I had what it takes, that I am worthy of this career, and that I simply needed to find the right firm for me - that it is as much the firm accepting me as it is me choosing the right firm for my personal development too.
Even though I continued to doubt and frustrate myself, Mel+LT never chided me and instead simply encouraged and repeated these until it finally sank in - and I knew I needed to make a change. That I was fully responsible for the outcome of my life. I can't control all of life but I can choose to control how I react and in making decisions that shapes where I wish to be. Through hard work, charm and constant discussions with Mel+LT, I finally managed to get an interview with the firm of my dreams - and thus began the long, protracted process of 6 arduous interviews over the course of 7 months with the firm.
The journey felt like an accelerated crash course in growth - I had to come face to face with my fears of not being good enough, to keep calm under immense pressure, to master my emotions, to listen to my intuition during critical junctures of the interview process, and also - to learn how to manifest. That manifestation was not just about getting the work in, but also having a single minded focus and dedication to the goal at hand - through mind, body and spirit. To visualize my future at the firm and seed the energy. To continue building up on the energy with the firm through constant contact with others at the firm. To visualize success through meditation, journals and my thoughts.
It is all too easy to let my mind run rampant and go into a negative space - and god knows throughout the process I was constantly vacillating, and there were times where I faltered. It was once again, the constant kind, loving support of Mel that gave me the boost I needed to keep myself going and from falling apart - in the past I would have, but the me that I am today is not who I was 3 years ago - which Mel + LT reminded me and that woke me up. Of how far I have come since a few years back, and that I have what it takes. That this, is the beginning of my path of becoming who I am truly meant to be - a version of Hillary Clinton but on my own terms.
Right now, as I am on the cusp of starting my new job with the firm of my dreams, once again other fears and worries pop up in my mind - of not being good enough/confident enough etc. But knowing what I know now, it is simply a crash course for my accelerated spiritual and personal growth - so that I can come into my own fully and, these lessons, though not the most pleasant, are there for a reason - to help me continue to grow, learn and be better.
Thank you Mel, and LT. I would never, ever have made it this far without your loving, kind support and advice. Perhaps it was fate or this was agreed upon a long time ago/in a different space and plane, but I am immensely grateful for your loving kindness and support.
Shan It's not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It's because we dare not venture that they are difficult. - SenecaL